In every relationship, its always two people, two souls reciprocating love, care, and concern sharing a common bond. But in this case, it was just one. Either ‘you’ or ‘me’, it was never ‘WE’.
‘You’ kept dominating, demanding and expecting.
‘Me’ kept following the orders, fulfilling demands and expectations.
‘You’ made himself available according to his needs.
‘Me’ was available 24*7. She never checked her watch when he needed her.
‘You’ asked for help, ordered as if he had all the rights on her.
‘Me’ helped with no questions and objections.
‘You’ never prioritized ‘Me’.
For ‘Me’, ‘You’ was the only priority. She could mould herself and adjust her schedule for him and she did so…but was taken for granted.
‘You’ asked to wait for a while.
‘Me’ did it for months.
‘You’ rejected the call, apologized and confirmed to call the day after (tomorrow).
‘Me’ accepted and apology and agreed to talk tomorrow..But Alas! tomorrow never came.
They had time issues…but still they talked for hours…the adjustment was obviously made by ‘Me”.
They had minor fights…but still they cared for each other…atleast ‘Me’ wasn’t fake, mean and selfish. ‘You’ himself praised her selflessness and even advised for not being selfless in dealings with everybody and anybody.
They knew they needed each other…but ‘You’ was seldom available..and by now you know about ‘Me’.
They were fond of each other..There were obvious reasons for ‘You’ but I never understood ‘Me’ s reasons.
They promised each other several things..the only difference was ‘Me’s promises were meant to be fulfilled and she did and ‘You’ never meant a word of what he said. Probably, he said things to please her which though wasn’t required.
‘You’ expected understanding whenever he was on the wrong footing but never bothered to understand ‘Me’ even on the platform where he misunderstood her.
‘Me’ was patient enough to have handled all that till a point came in her life where it became impossible to deal with ‘You’. That was the first time she denied to understand that he cannot be convinced and she exploded for the very first instance for him to listen, understand what she has to say and accept that he did wrong.
‘You’ committed several mistakes and it became his habit to repeat and apologize though he promised not to repeat.
‘Me’ once committed a mistake (in his eyes)..which in Me’s opinion was her anger, frustration, discontentment, fretfulness and ire towards him. And the same was tagged as her mistake by ‘You’, in order to save his own hands and cover up for his mistakes.
‘You’ was dependent on ‘Me’ and she never disappointed him.
‘Me’ couldn’t depend on him as he was not at all dependable. Though she knew this hard found fact about him but some where in her heart she did depend on him and he too knew the fact but never bothered..instead thought that its good, atleast this would compel her to stick to him & she would never leave..but he forgot everything has its limits and when something is filled in beyond the limits, it is destined to overflow..And so did ‘Me’…Deep down, in her heart, she broke..She cried hard inside but still managed to move on with a Smile…Gradually, she felt the need to make him realize her value, her worth and that he needed her more than she needed him.
In the name of friendship, It was only ‘Me’ who made adjustments, compromises and settlements. It was ‘Me’ who felt like being used, taken for granted and treated like a foot mat by the one for whom she once thought she was a good friend.
And, it was ‘You’ who made false promises, excuses and told lies..It was him who always expected without being able to come up to the smallest expectation of ‘Me’.
This time ‘Me’ was saturated to the core, tired of trying to understand, fed up hanging on to the one who does not value her presence and is so indifferent towards her, unwilling to put in one-sided efforts any more. She gave up on him. And, eventually they stopped talking.Though presently ‘Me’ is broken, troubled, shattered and disturbed. But, it will soon be past and forgotten. Once she is able to recover and move on, she will never commit a mistake judging people and this time she will surely find someone for whom she is prior, for whom both her presence and absence matter… 🙂
In the coming days, when ‘You’ will realize what he has lost while nurturing his Ego and Attitude, then he will then step in the shoes of ‘Me’ and this will be forever. That day he will be left with nothing but regrets and repent for being so insensitive, ignorant, unkind, mean and selfish, for not having valued what he was lucky enough to have, for having chosen bad luck, sorrow, pain and grief for himself, and last but not the least for having lost “Me”… 😦
And that day, ‘Me’ too will be helpless and unable to help him overcome that situation and she’ll still feel bad for him. She’ll still pray for him to be blessed but she would no longer be his lucky charm. She’ll still be concerned but not connected. She’ll still wish him all the happiness and peace in the world but she’ll no longer be the reason. She’ll still be the same yet different. She’ll still be standing for him but not by his side. She’ll still be there but not Together. And that day he’ll realize ‘Me’ had gone long ago, he lost his irreplaceable ‘Me’ long ago…and this time irrevocably, irreversibly, indelibly for infinity. ‘You’ lost ‘Me’ for ever… 😦