If I could read his mind..!!

I believed, He lied

I asked, He denied.

I trusted, He faked.

I admitted, He neglected.

But when we talked.

Conversations were never too bad,

Some of them were the best we could have had.

He always convinced,

He always pursued,

that even he was affected.

It’s just that he keeps too busy,

And for him too this wasn’t so easy.

and I was carried by his explanations,

made up my mind to understand his situations.

Things went back to normal,

we broke the barriers that were formal.

But then he always repeated things he once said sorry for,

And that’s what made me unsure and insecure.

Same situations prevailed,

circumstances never changed.

He talked when there was any need,

when there was any help that he sought.

To this, I did not really pay any heed.

Till to my mind came up a thought.

Was there really any connection as he said?

Was there really any attachment as he claimed?

If yes, then why did he not show up

at those times when ‘his selfness’ wasn’t involved?

If yes, then why did he not show up

at times when I ‘needed him’ and was shattered?

I was in the need of an assurance,

wipe out the doubts and gain confidence.

Asking him would mean he would win over me.

Through his sweet coated words he would convince.

And then I wished “I could read his mind”

I wanted to know what was going inside?

whether he felt the same or only I was affined?

Only I was chained or he too was confined?

And be sure that I am not wrong in trusting him blind.

It isn’t like that I doubt him..!!

But want to test my Faith on him..!!

Want to know what he thinks of me..??

Or does he not even bother about me..??

Want to know how often do I cross his mind..??

Is the count larger than mine..??

If it is, its good and if it’s not, even that is not bad,

I took the lead, I’ll be glad.

Even if, not as much as he crosses mine,

Atleast I do cross his mind.

That will give me an assurance enough.

Then I won’t let things go so rough.

Those things between us will then go on smoother,

As is said ” When the tough gets going, the going gets better”.

For once only, if  ‘I could read his mind’..!!

And if he lets my faith on him ‘Win’…

I promise, I would for the rest of my life, ‘Trust him blind’.

P.S. –

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

2 thoughts on “If I could read his mind..!!

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